Software Review by Al Giovetti Sunday, June 22, 2008
It is amazing what you will learn in the “return items here” line at Circuit City.
I was waiting in the “return items here” line, minding my own business. It was impossible to ignore the conversation going on in line just in front of me. I just had to eavesdrop, you understand.
There was this man trying to return a laptop computer. He insisted that the salesman had assured him that he did not need any reason at all to return the item. He was asking why the clerk behind the counter was insisting that he give a reason why he was returning the laptop.
The man went on to explain that when he bought the computer, he was not sure that he would really like it. The salesman assured him that if he did not like the computer, he could return it. The salesman had insisted that he buy it and return it, if he didn’t like it. The man relented and started to explain his dilemma.
He said, “you see this little eraser thing in the center of the keyboard. This eraser thing is not anything like my desktop mouse. Every time that I touch this eraser thing, the cursor runs all the way across the screen. I have a devil of a time trying to point at anything and click.”
“My desktop mouse fits easily into my hand. It points precisely. It makes short work of the “point and click” process.”
“This eraser thing surely won’t do. I really need my mouse. You see Mr. Circuit City employee, I am just not a laptop kind of guy.”
“You see this laptop keyboard. The keys are so small. It is very easy for me to hit the wrong key.
“The layout is all wrong for the cursor pad. The keys are not in the same place as on my desktop keyboard. I find all the keys easily with hardly a mistake.”
This laptop keyboard won’t do. I really need my desktop keyboard. You see Mr. Circuit City employee, I am just not a laptop kind of guy.”
“The laptop keyboard is attached to the monitor. You have to leave it on the desk near the computer. You cannot put the laptop keyboard on your lap, while the monitor is on the desk.
My desktop keyboard is not attached to my monitor. If I get fatigued I can place my desktop keyboard anywhere. Why, I can even put the desktop keyboard on my lap where it is the most comfortable.
This laptop keyboard won’t do. I really need my desktop keyboard. You see Mr. Circuit City employee, I am just not a laptop kind of guy.”
“You see this tiny little laptop screen attached to the rest of the computer. This laptop screen is way down here where the keyboard is. I have to bend my neck to see the screen. My neck gets this crick in it right about here. Frankly using the laptop screen is a pain.”
My desktop screen is right in front of my eyes. I can put it on the same level as my eyes and not have to bend my neck. My desktop screen is not attached to the keyboard. I don’t get that little crick in my neck.
The print on the laptop screen is so small. You see the desktop monitor is only fourteen inches. I can hardly see the letters even with my glasses on. I get eyestrain looking at it.
The print on my desktop monitor is large. I find it very easy to read. The desktop monitor is nineteen inches. I never get eyestrain looking at it.
This laptop screen will not do. I really need my desktop monitor. You see Mr. Circuit City employee, I am just not a laptop kind of guy.”
You see these tiny little laptop speakers. These speakers don’t give a clear sound. I have to strain my ears to hear it.
My desktop speakers can be placed anywhere to make them clearer. The speakers have separate controls for volume, treble, and bass. I can set this woofer on the floor and the tweeters next to my monitor. The sound is clear and crisp.
These laptop speakers will not do. I really need my desktop speakers. You see Mr. Circuit City employee, I am just not a laptop kind of guy.”
The laptop sits on the desk or on my lap. After a while working with the laptop, it gets hot and I have to turn it off. Sometimes it gets so hot it shuts itself down.
My desktop sits on my desk. My desktop never overheats or shuts down on its own. The fans in the case keep my desktop cool.
This laptop overheating won’t do. I really need my cool desktop. You see Mr. Circuit City employee, I am just not a laptop kind of guy.”
See this battery here on the bottom of the laptop. This battery runs out quickly if I don’t have the laptop plugged in. I have to turn off the laptop before it shuts itself down from low power.
My desktop doesn’t have a battery. My desktop is plugged into good old reliable electric wall power. My desktop never gives me a low battery light.
This laptop battery won’t do. I really need my reliable desktop power cord. You see Mr. Circuit City employee, I am just not a laptop kind of guy.”
Sure the laptop has this “small footprint.” The cord is really composed of three components and you have to take time to figure how to assemble the whole thing. Each component has a separate type of connector. And what is this with the cord that has a brick attached. This brick never conveniently goes anyplace. What is up with this brick in the power cord?
My desktop cord is one piece. It does not have a “brick” attached. It does not need assembly. It conveniently plugs into reliable wall power.
This laptop power cord won’t do. I really need my reliable desktop power cord. You see Mr. Circuit City employee, I am just not a laptop kind of guy.”
At this point the circuit city employee had had quite enough of an explanation. He stopped the old man from continuing his tirade. He said the explanation the old man had given was fine, and tried to rush him out of the store with his refund.
Meanwhile I had pulled a piece of paper and a pen from my pocket and had been taking notes furiously. I was vastly disappointed since the man was leaving the store. I had no way of getting to all the other pearls of wisdom the old man had to share on the old question of laptop vs. desktop.
I decided to go look for the man after I returned my item to Circuit City. When I went to look for the old man, he was nowhere to be found. If you ever encounter the man who is just not a laptop kind of guy, please let me know.
If I can be of any help please contact me. I remain willing and able to discuss anything over a cup of joe or tea. Just let me know at voice 410-747-0396, email Alfred@giovetti.com, fax 410-747-6357, or drop by the office on Frederick Road in Catonsville. The number on the office door is 1615.
Remember the maxim, “friends are welcome anytime, relatives are by appointment only.”
